Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Powell, Ohio for Dummies part 2 (the men)

I was overwhelmed with requests to let the men in on the social scene in our community. Hopefully this will be a helpful Cliff Note version of men in Powell and how to fit in seamlessly.
I am going to detail 5 distinct groups and let you decide where you belong.


1) The Frat Boy: The guy who never really left his college days even though he got a job, got married and had a family. He still spends his nights playing pool and chest bumping his buddies over the score of the game. He likes to crush beer cans on his forehead and grunt unintelligibly. He uses his muscles to blind people to his deficiencies in other areas.
2) CEO Dad: These are the guys who are the president of their job (no matter what that might be) and want everyone to know it. They flaunt their axcess to all the local sporting events and have extensive collections of shiny metal toys in their garage. They spend the weekends out on their boats while their kids bond with the nanny. They often fly off to Tahiti on a moments notice. They want their kids to have everything they didn't have no matter what the they have to sacrifice to provide it.
3) Ubber Dad: This guy is D-A-D down to his tighty whities. He is often seen pulling the kids around on a sled with his John Deer. He can't have a conversation without telling you the score of his kids games or the grade they got on their science project. He wears his coaches shirt even after the season is over and always has those picture buttons of his kids in their uniforms on the front of his jacket. This guy lets his daughters dress him up and polish his nails and enjoys every minute of it.
4) Mr. Mom: Diapers, skinned knees and sippy cups everywhere! This dad is usually wearing an apron and baking cookies. When he isn't in the kitchen he is out shuttling the kids around or at the grocery store. He is supportive of his ladder climbing wife on the outside but feeling inadequate beyond belief on the inside.
5) The Rebel: Moved here for the great school system but refuses to give up the freedom of life without deed restrictions. Even though they are quite vocal about their irritation over all the rules they are the first to shovel the snow and trim the trees bitching all the while.

**Thanks to Amy and Abby for the the insight on this post**

1 comment:

ishatrisha said...

i'm looking for me an Uber-Dad who would love some step-kids, and has been through an amicable divorce! keep your eyes open!

it would be funny to see which group the dad's would place themselves in.

trisha