Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Restraining Order

 The hardest thing about being a mom is maintaining restraint. You want your kids to be safe and happy and the best at everything. Moving heaven and earth to make these things happen is the first option. But it is a hard knock life out there. Each and every lesson builds character and creates an independent self confident person. We have to restrain ourselves from making things too easy. Kids need to make mistakes and take risks. As much as we want to buy stock in bubble wrap and cushion every fall we just can't. Those tumbles feel bad when they happen and we want to take the pain away. We want them to get an A and have the cute boy ask them out. We want them to win the game and pass their drivers test. We want everyone to know how beautiful they are inside and out and how fast and how smart and how wonderful they are. Moms want to shout those things from the rooftops or to the teachers at school or to the coaches on the field or to the other moms also on the roof. Yet we have to hold ourselves back from telling the story. Our kids will do that in their own time. They don't need mom written subtitles. They will shine at what they love and excel at what they enjoy. It is one hundred times better when the teacher or the coach or the other mom comes up to you and tells you what you already know about your kid...they are extraordinary. Moms are strong that is for sure but not strong enough to move mountains. Our kids have to learn to tunnel through and that takes time and patience.

Stepping back is hard. Watching quietly is excruciating. Raising a child who won't look back someday from the therapist's chair and curse you is priceless.