They also predispose kids to be thought of in certain ways. I remember when I was 8 or 9 and I was labeled the shy one. Sure I cried a lot and turned red at the drop of a hat but instead of words of encouragement I got dismissed as being quiet and boring. That label shaped who I am now. It made it hard to step forward. It made me believe it myself. The label turned into a box. One that surrounds you with...you can't or ...you shouldn't or .... that's who you ARE. It backs you into a corner that is hard to escape from..those labels. You are a nerd or you are fat or you are dumb or you are gay. Kids are mean. Things spoken in a moment of anger or sometimes jealousy that can cause a lifetime of hurt. All words that set up roadblocks that are sometimes insurmountable for children. As parents we can love our kids and tell them how great they are out the wazoo but the label is still there squarely on their forehead when they look in the mirror. We try to make our kids strong and self confident. To teach them to be rubber and let mean bullying bounce off. It's just words the other parents and the teachers like to believe.
It isn't like they punched them in the face or pushed them down. But they did. And many times they can't get back up.Teach your children empathy. They could be on the other side at any moment and how would they want others to treat them? Discourage cliques. Not every person has to be your friend but you have to be friendly to everyone. That is my mantra . As hard as it is to remember when you are the target the ones shooting the darts have weaknesses too. Most of the time the only way they know how to make themselves feel stronger is to knock others
down. The long run of life doesn't look kindly on people who climb the ladder that way. By knocking other people out of the way. Eventually it all catches up to them and they are the ones who are left alone.
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