Always be sure to check the cats mouth for mice, birds or well anything alive or formerly alive before letting him inside.
Never focus attention on one kid when all three are sitting there clambering for attention. You will end up with mucho eye rolls, tears and a migraine.
Leaving a glass of water on your nightstand right next to your cell phone and laptop is never a good idea. NEVER.
You really do learn something new every single day. Sometimes it is as small as finding a new flavor of gum and sometimes it is as big as realizing how wrong you were about something.
Starbucks really can turn a frown upside down even if it is ridiculously overpriced.
Not all people have good intentions. Sometimes they want something and will do whatever it takes to get it...over and over again.
Cute shoes are most often painful as are cute underware and sometimes even cute seven year olds.
Eating 2 bowls of Lucky Charms at 10pm makes you have dreams about little green men, rainbows and sparkling pots of gold.
Never use your teeth to try and fix the dryer-bent clasps on your favorite bra. It could end in a cut on your tongue, a scratch on your chin or worst case both.
Laziness equals 10 pair of identical denim shorts and 10 white tank tops. Buying new is easier then trying to dig through the mess of your closet.