Turn Over a New Leaf

It seems Fall is always a time for change. With the dawn of a new school year ahead there is always a chance for reinvention. I remember when I was going into middle school and then high school how I would sit there in the days before school started almost writing my own story for the school year in my head. Who I would be, what I would wear, how I would react to things and exactly who I wouldn't be from my experience the previous year. I am a little past the school days now but not past the need for change and reinvention. With my last little bird flying off to kindergarten this year I have some choices and decisions to make myself. Exactly who I will be and what I want to accomplish for just me as opposed to the last 11 years of me being ME with a kid attached to my hip. My thoughts are really jumbled at the moment so it is hard to find a clear path. I guess that is what happens when you lose sight of your own thoughts and goals among playdates and dirty diapers for so long. It is almost like a new beginning to the second half of my life. Exciting because there are so many options available but scary at the same time. I certainly wouldn't trade in the last eleven years that I have had the opportunity to be the one the sun rises and sets on for my kids. I have learned invaluable things about myself that I wish I had known before college. I wouldn't have chosen the same education path then if I had owned a crystal ball. I know life doesn't work that way though you have to live some things to get to the point where you are ready to make changes and informed choices. The one thing I can see clearly through the fog of the unknown is that I want to...no actually I believe I really need to...make a difference in whatever it is I chose to do in the years to come. It is like I am staring up at a vast night sky with hundreds of twinkling stars and I am reaching for them.